Ghost Rider 2: Spirit of Vengence

There was no way anyone thought that Ghost Rider 2: Spirit of Vengeance was going to be anything more than a bad movie. The only debate was if it was going to be so bad that it was good or that it was going to be just terrible. It had all the tools to be the former, I'm just not quite sure if the movie got there. As long as you don't get bogged down by things like acting, cohesiveness or consistency then there is a chance you may find the trashy fun in Ghost Rider 2 that I'm sure it was supposed to have.

Nicolas Cage returns as The Ghost Rider the superhero that always had the potential to be cool, just not if it was reigned in by a PG-13 rating. He sold his soul to Satan and now is consumed by this demon who hunts down evil men for the devil. The back story seems more or less irrelevant but the directing duo of Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor does do something fun with it by animating the story to give the movie more of the comic book feel. Once they cut back to present day they can go right into the action. That may be the only thing they get right in the whole movie.

Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor are the same duo who brought you Crank 2. I never saw that movie though because I believe Crank had a pretty solidified ending where there was no coming back from. Well apparently I was wrong so it is clear that these two have no problem dealing in the ridiculous including having the Rider piss fire. If any of you saw the trailer this may have been the moment where you laughed to yourselves and thought this may be a fun movie to see. While that scene may have been intended for more, it is such a throwaway moment that there is no doubt in my mind they put it in there just for the sake of the trailer.

Cage seems to only be putting in half effort in this one. You may be saying to yourself how does an Academy Award winning actor who has agreed to do whatever movie he can to pay off his massive tax bills put in even less effort? Well if there is one thing that ole Nic has become known for it is when he flies off the handle, and that seems to be the only time he puts in any effort into the movie. Add that to the fact that when Blaze became the rider he didn't need to show up at all thanks to CGI. Cage phones this movie in from the get go and that is saying a lot considering the movies he has been doing

They did everything they possibly could to ruin this movie, they made it PG-13, they shot it all in Eastern Europe to keep the budget low, they got rid of any semblance of recognizable actors they had from the original and of course they added an annoying child to the plot line. There are some of you that I'm sure will still find a way to enjoy the movie. But I think my head would have hurt less if I had left the 3D glasses off the whole movie. D-

Trespass

It is tough to believe that Nicolas Cage's money problems are still this bad. It really is a shame that an Academy Award winning actor now has to do movies like this. But what I can't figure out is why Nicole Kidman is involved. This is a movie that at one point had discussions of going directly to DVD, but due to some big names got a theatrical debut. For whatever the reason Joel Schumacher, who always seems to direct movies this bad yet still get some kind of box office, strikes again as he makes his attempt at the recent brash of home invasion movies.

Allow me to save you some time and tell you Cage plays a diamond investor looking to make a big score for his family who feels alienated from him. Meanwhile thieves bust into his house and want the money and the stones. From there as one can expect Cage loses his shit and refuses to go along with their plan. Then the threats from the thieves come pouring in, making all sorts of demands to get a big pay day. The last two steps repeat themselves for the next HOUR. Literally no difference: Do this or I will kill that, then Cage refuses and the process repeats itself.

I'm sure someone thought to themselves, how are we going to keep raising the tension in this scene? Rather than any character exploration or originality they choose to just move the gun around to different people. For those of you interested in how the writing meetings went my crack detective team was able to record a meeting before a shoot: "Who haven't we threatened yet? We already did all three, well how about we have the thieves threaten each other? We did that too? Fine what’s the running time? We still need 20 more minutes? Damn it! Well threaten them all again but this time with a knife, I'm calling it a day." So with legitimate tension clearly gone from the script the camera man does his best to move the camera back and forth really quickly, I applaud your attempt sir. They also kept trying to insert plot twists throughout the movie, but they aren't twists so much as a step by step following of how every movie like this is done.

By the end of the movie people in my screening were actually laughing about what was going on. This is a great movie if you want something completely over the top and melodramatic and need to turn your brain off for about 90 minutes; you just need to ask yourself if that is worth ten bucks. If all you need is an over the top laughs save your money for your convenience I have posted a video of The Wicker Man below, it has been condensed to its shortest and funniest format which is how I wish Trespass was edited. D-

Kick-Ass

This movie starts out by satirizing the comic book genre, then showing the reality of what would happen if you were to become a superhero, and then finally becomes a part of the genre that it began satirizing. All the way to the final frame where the movie leaves itself open for a sequel. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it actually reaches out to its main fanbase and thus makes the movie more enjoyable.

The movie follows the evolution of nerdy high school student as Dave Lizewski wishes to become a superhero without any training or superior talent, just the drive and passion. As you would imagine he becomes capable of taking quite the beating. But really he is just the catalyst for all the other characters around him

The real heroes of the story turn out to be a former cop and his 13 year old daughter (played by Nicolas Cage and Chloe Moretz respectively). I have never hidden my vile for Nicolas Cage and everything he has ever been in, but I actually enjoy him in this role. The character combines the loving support of Ward Cleaver with the blood lust of The Bride from the Kill Bill series. His Adam West speaking voice combined with the soft and loving nature of his voice with the content of his message creates a wonderful character.

Then there is Mindy Macready the little girl in pig tails. The sensible man of society in me should be disgusted that Hollywood can allow a little girl to be subjected to so much for the sake of entertainment. But the fan boy in me tells the other half to shut the hell up because its funny to watch a little girl use the C-word.

The movie shifts focus about half way through when the these three characters meet up. It becomes more about Hit Girl and Big Daddy then Dave using his superhero alter ego to gain confidence and to bang the school hottie.

The movie caught a lot of flack for casting a 13 year old in a role that harbors so much death, but the movie is a comedy. We laugh at the gruesome and awesome ways the bad guys are laid to waste, and that's how we know that the movie shouldn't be taken seriously. Parents be warned this isn't for younger eyes, but the movie is definitely for the kid in you. B